Philosophy had long assumed two forms of identity: sameness and selfhood. Sameness echoes to the enduring traits and qualities that allow for the identification and recognition of an object or person across time; a consistency transcending change. Selfhood refers to personal sense of self. It captures the fluid nature of our identity and dynamic process of evolution, mutation and change, a personal sense of self that adapts while somehow remaining tethered to its core. Both are anchored in the material world, grounded in the physical and sensorial qualities that make the tangible real.

But the digital self, on the contrary, operates on another dimension – as a fragmented duplication or reinvention of the self in the virtual realm. The simulated selves are then more prevalent than the individual, existing in a space of diffusion and elusiveness, able to disappear. The first physical encounter with an online persona often feels uncanny, unsettling—raising questions that I explored with Zenin Soul. Familiar with her work yet unsure of its direct connection to Soul as a person, I asked her: ‍

Cyana-Djoher: Are you an internet persona, an avatar or a creative director? How do you bridge these two different sets of identities?

Zenin Soul: I get this question pretty often! I would say I don’t like putting myself in a box, but overall, I am a director and creative director. I usually direct brand campaigns, bringing together the marketing and creative sides.

I like coming up with concepts for brands in which there are levels and layers through which I incorporate myself, but still manage to market the idea.

I've opted for the unconventional path of appearing in front of the camera. In directing, you typically oversee all aspects of production, so when executing a quick idea, I prefer to do everything myself, especially since I incorporate myself into my work. I might model the concept, sometimes even shoot and edit it myself. Fortunately, I'm now able to involve others in my concepts. I’m going through this transition of professionalizing myself indirection and creative direction, I think this will clear the path a little.

C: And expand the virtual scenery you’re showcasing? You seem to have a 360-degree practice where you embody a variety of roles while staying committed to your personal style and aesthetic. Do you ever get confused within your own inner ecosystem?

S: Yes, overall, I’m a creative. I like to think of it as blending my own world with my outlook on situations and relationships, making it feel more unique.

I don’t really rely on external references; it's more about how I process things and how they operate in my mind.

That’s how I like to create these concepts, by incorporating both light and dark elements. I do play on this ambivalence. I believe that many people have light within them, no matter what, and I love exploring that dynamic.

C: It feels like you’re channeling your own reality through specific imagery and scenery, almost like navigating different levels in a video game. Even your name has this very, video game character vibe. Do you ever feel like a character playing a game?

S: I kind of view life, and myself, as a player in a video game.

I see each stage of life as a new level, and all complications as necessary obstacles on a harder level.

It's funny that you mention my name—my Instagram handle is @Left4Soul, and my favorite video game is Left 4 Dead. That’s why I combined the two, because I see life as a video game. I love merging these two worlds together.

C: I feel you on this—I'm big on manifestation, and I see life as a game where each new level, obstacle, or even enemy is essential to moving forward. It’s all part of the path. Like gaining XP, you learn to anticipate, perfect your tactics and prepare mentally for what's next. You can always bring others into your personal narrative, even when it’s confrontational. Do you explore these elements of immersion and confrontation within your practice?

S: When it comes to creating my own reality, last year was when I truly started manifesting and scripting. I learned about something called quantum leaping—the idea that if you can imagine yourself in a different reality, you can actually find yourself there. For me, fantasy isn’t something imaginary; it’s real, you just need to tap into it.

C: Absolutely, I see it the same way—everything, whether good, bad, or neutral, is potential energy that you can align with, and watch unfold. It’s all about the unfolding. Creatively speaking, what would you say was your Level 1?

S: Level 1 was a breakthrough moment for me. I was a radically different person two years ago; I had creative energy but wasn’t truly using it.

I went through an ego death and a rebirth, which I like to call the "Dark Night of the Soul."

I’m very grateful for that time; it gave me the space to process my emotions and find my path, teaching me that I could take very uncomfortable situations and turn them into art. I appreciate that it's not just black or white, but that there are layers of understanding. I’m also very grateful for the people who appreciate and understand my work.

C: It’s funny you mention the concept of “ego death” like in Be Here Now by Ram Dass. I bought the book when I was 15 and recently revisited it with a friend. One part we read delved into “ego death” as a pathway to spiritual ascension and creative living. I see it as a process of developing tools and techniques for mastering reality crafting. How did you approach this within your practice? Did you start from scratch, experiment with different methods, or did it unfold naturally?

S: A few years ago, I took on the role of creative director for several brands to better shape the overall vision. During that process, I discovered how much I love doing it, and it sparked something within me.

Last year, I started scripting extensively and writing about how I felt, often in a conceptual and subconscious way.

After going through these pages, I realized that everything could become a shoot. So, I think the tools were there in a way; I think in terms of images, and I needed those images in my head to come to life—it helps to be more specific. As soon as I can make an ida physical and visible, it gives me a sense of relief and helps me connect with people, which is also quite healing.

C: It’s a real scenarizing practice then.

S: Yes, that’s how I experience a sense of relief. It used to be more about incorporating those feelings into myself due to the direction of the movement. Now, when I’m directing models,

I vocalize every detail to truly communicate the emotion and create both a physical and somatic response.

C: Healing through showcasing pain, it's shadow work in a way. Do you see this as a constant theme in your work, or do you feel that as you heal, you’ll redirect your energy towards a different set of imagery?

S: That’s a great question. The other day, a friend asked me, “But what happens when you’re happy?” and I hadn’t really thought about it before. I still have many concepts coming to mind from past experiences. I’m very happy and healed now, so there’s a difference in the timelines, I believe. My work doesn’t necessarily reflect my current state of mind but rather my reality. What’s also important to me is addressing the issues women face daily, especially within specific spheres like the industry. I’d like to expand more on this aspect; my work is meant for the girls, the dolls, the feminine energy, regardless of gender.

C: Do you tone down your creative vision when working with clients?

S: When working with brands, I’m often asked to “not make it scary,” which I find quite amusing. I do adapt, as it’s a mutual exchange.

For the last campaign I worked on, the concept involved models in bikinis throwing paint at their posters. The layers of understanding are multiple—primarily, it highlighted how models often don’t get to choose which images of them are published, essentially vandalizing their own work. It also addresses the inner toxicity of the industry and the competition among women to be selected. So, while we mutually agree on the concepts and visuals, there are always different layers of understanding.